Once my friend called me over to some adventure sport and I said, ‘no thanks’, I am happy with my dentist! If you were to rate the scariest things on earth on a scale 1-10, I am sure the local dentist tips the scale to 9 and the 10 goes to the ‚orthodontist’- for it’s his unique capacity to send shivers, not just when he’s operating on you but thereafter, when he sends the bill!
Eating chocolates is a very happy & thrilling experience. Happy because, it releases endorphins- the happy hormones that makes one (read Dentist) happy!’ and thrilling because you will be on a scary ride thereafter, courtesy- The dentist! I was one of these chocolate consuming creatures that often made the world of dentistry happy.
A visit to the dentist is like a horror flick show. Like the horror movies, they don’t show the monster (read Dentist) at the beginning, the nurse and his receptionist helps in building up the tension and then our protagonist just lives to it! Talking about horror flicks, I just figured out the reason, for horror genres to be more popular than the other movies, when I recently visited a dentist. Like the horror shows that keeps the cash machine ringing even when it’s speaking in foreign tongues, the dentist no matter what language they speak, vernacular or otherwise, they can just manage to keep you scared stiff. After a brief ceremonial exchange of wishes, in the name of courtesy, the dentist proceeded to examine my teeth. After the initial probing and tapping, what I call the Fore play! He clicked his tongue swaying his head sideways and said, cant save tooth, tooth should come out’, well then lets wait for it him to come out, I thought. Maybe the doc didn’t want to ask my tooth nicely and resorted to his learning’s! ‘Teeth extraction’ he said in halting English. ‘Big Molar, very very bad’. ’Is it the wisdom tooth doc?’ I asked. He looked puzzled and said ‘no no he’s a bad tooth’.
‘Will it pain’, I asked and he looked at me, like I just farted in a funeral and said, ‘Nein’. He then proceeded to give me a local anesthetic shot’ and went away to attend on another patient till I get just right for the ‘Big Play’. It was a big room and was plainly decorated with just a few postures stuck around with tips on dental health and there was one big blue poster portraying an array of sparkling teeth in an anonymous mouth and it read , ‘Smile and the world smiles at you’. It must have been half hour after the shot and after a heavy feeling of numbness, when the doc stepped in. I smiled at him and the doc’s eyes weighed upon me, his intentions of a serious business. ‘So much for the poster’, I thought.
He seated himself, beside me and started the ‘foreplay’ again just to see if I could feel anything. Before I realised, the nurse stuck a small Hoover in my mouth and the doc proceeded to cut my gums around the ‚'Bad Bad Molar’. He now brought forth a small drill and asked the nurse to hold my tongue with a probe, lest I tongue his drill. He then said in a muffled voice, ‘tell me if it pains’. Must have been a joke, `cause the more I grew stiff with the slowly progressing pain, the firmer, the nurse held my tongue, `maybe, the dentists have progressed to telepathy’, I thought. The ´Bad Bad molar´ turned out to be a `Big Bad Molar’ and the shot was just too weak for him and I started to writhe in pain.
After a time, that seemed like eternity, the doc finally won the dual and held the molar proudly, with an expression of holding out a trophy! Only when I thought, everything was over; he proceeded to stitch the gum. `Now `, he said, 'ALL OVER' . You were not as cooperative as the patient before’, he said .The patient must have passed away, after his shot, I thought. `Any Pain?’ he asked. With the nurse still holding my tongue , I decided to answer him better, with a sign language. I wanted to show him ‘The Finger’. A large bloke as he was, with an assortment of Dentists’ paraphernalia, lying beside, I decided to use my prudence better and showed him my ‘thumb’.
